This chapter's exercise is about doing some personal reflection. There are no right or wrong answers here, instead this is an opportunity for you to take some time and think about your ethical values and beliefs.
A letter to the past (10 mins.)
This exercise asks you to explore what it would take to change your mind about something important.
Imagine someone from the past who held views characteristic of that time. Also imagine, for the sake of the exercise, that this person is not too different from you - perhaps you would have been friends. Unfortunately, many people in the past were complicit in horrible things, such as slavery, sexism, racism, and homophobia, which were even more prevalent in the past than they are now. And, sadly, this historical counterpart is also complicit in some moral tragedy common to their time, perhaps not out of malevolence or ill-will, but merely through indifference or ignorance.
This exercise is to write a short letter to this historical friend arguing that they should care about a specific group that your present self values. Imagine that they are complicit in owning slaves, or in the oppression of women, people of other races, or sexual minorities.
For the sake of this exercise, imagine your historical counterpart is not malevolent or selfish, they think they are living a normal moral life, but are unaware of where they are going wrong. What could you say to them to make them realize that they’re doing wrong? What evidence are they overlooking that allows them to hold their discriminatory views? You might want to write a few paragraphs or just bullet points, and spend time reflecting on what you write.
Hey Clara,
I hope you don’t mind me writing to you like this. I’ve been thinking a lot about you and Amara lately — how close you two have become, how much you clearly care for her. It’s obvious to anyone who visits that she’s not just another servant to you. You trust her, you laugh with her, and I’ve even seen you cry together. There’s something real there.
But I can’t help but wonder — what if things could be different? I know everyone around us just accepts things as they are, but what if we’re all missing something important? What if the love and respect you feel for Amara means she deserves so much more than just being your maid? What if you could actually be together, as equals, not just as lady and servant, but as partners in life?
I know it sounds wild, but think about it: what if you could marry her? Not just in secret, not just as a fantasy, but openly, with pride. Imagine a world where nobody would look twice at two women who love each other, no matter the colour of their skin. Imagine how much happier you both could be, not having to hide or pretend.
I think sometimes we get so used to the way things are that we forget to ask if they should be that way. People say it’s just the way of the world, but who decides that? Why shouldn’t you be able to love who you love, and treat her as your equal?
You’ve always been brave and kind. I hope you’ll think about this — not just what’s expected of you, but what could actually make you both happy, and what’s truly right. Maybe, one day, people will look back and wonder why we ever let anything as silly as skin colour or old rules get in the way of real love.
With all my love and hope,
Krystyna